Homestuck: Act 6 Act 3

Act 6 Act 3  is part of Act 6.

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 * HS 6717 The scene zooms out of the Intermission's curtain and moves over to a declaration of the end of the 3rd year of Homestuck before zooming into the curtain for Act 6 Act 3.
 * HS 6720 The curtains of Act 3 open on Jane's land. See Myststuck for details.
 * HS 6721UU welcomes Jane to LOCAH, while avoiding questions about what her 'brother' has done to mess stuff up.
 * HS 6722Roxy berates Jane for losing her chance with Jake, despite her whole neighborhood being on fire.
 * HS 6723Jake appears to be in trouble, as the volcano next to his house is exploding. By the end of their conversation, he is unconscious.
 * Jane solves the puzzles and enters the Maid's room.
 * HS 6724 The action pauses to let players verify they have completed the first part of Myststuck, while offering a handy guide for those who haven't.
 * HS 6725 In the second part of Myststuck, Jane continues onwards and converses with Dirk's auto-responder before finding her house and sending it back to the surface. Upon arriving back at her house she discovers God Tier Gamzee with Aradia's music box time machines.
 * HS 6727 Jane approaches Gamzee and he attempts to sell her a number of interestingly colored potions.
 * HS 6728 Jane becomes annoyed with Gamzee's potion selling and asks him to leave her property.
 * HS 6729 Gamzee decides to respect Jane's wishes but declares she needs someone to be her guide and opens her fridge revealing the corpses of Tavros and Vriska before throwing both of them into Jane's sprite, much to her horror.
 * HS 6734 This creates Tavrisprite, a combination of Tavros and Vriska's personalities.
 * HS 6735 Tavrisprite starts to violently freak out, while Jane tries to calm it down. Jane fails to calm it down and it Tavrispl♉des.
 * HS 6738 Tavros and Vriska appear on the Land of Sand and Zephyr.
 * HS 6739 Tavros and Vriska share their experiences as Tavrisprite. While Tavros got to experience Vriska's self-confidence, she thought of it as a nightmare. They also both claim responsibility for Vriska's murder of Tavros. She also tells of her resent towards being chased by a freaky orange dude, and feels that cosmic forces are at work suppressing both her and Tavros's time in the spotlight. Vriska decides to "fuck shit up", and psychically forces Tavros to agree.
 * HS 6741 Back on Earth, Jake has lost consciousness while exploring a time capsule beneath his island. In a dream bubble Jake remembers his thirteenth birthday in 2008, Dirk sends him the head of the Brobot, the last piece needed to complete it. The two discuss an upcoming movie called Avatar (which Dirk mocks and claims to have already seen), but when the conversation turns to how Dirk is able to build technology that even Jake's Grandma couldn't make, Dirk drops some not-so-subtle hints before revealing the truth: He and Roxy live in the year 2422 - or 411 P.C. (Post Condescension) - and are likely the last humans alive. They are able to communicate with Jane and Jake with a special version of Pesterchum provided by UU.
 * HS 6747 Jake completes the Brobot, which goes into "Stalking Mode" and flees immediately. Dirk begins telling the story of how the Crockercorp Baroness launched her world domination campaign on November 11, 2011 and spent the next few decades solidifying her rule and crushing all attempt at rebellion. The Condesce's primary goal was to remake Earth into a new Alternia by populating it with Lusus and replacing humanity with cloned trolls, but the clones were destroyed by Gl'bgolyb's Vast Glub, so she imposed the troll reproduction system on humanity instead using lusidroids and robotic Imperial Drones. As the centuries passed, the human population was devastated through global flooding caused by the Condesce's melting of the ice caps, failed genetic experiments designed to give humans a Hemospectrum, and other atrocities committed by Earth's new ruler. Eventually, Dirk and Roxy were the only humans left. Dirk was forced to raise himself, while Roxy was raised by the Carapacians (the citizens of Prospit and Derse) in one of their floating colonies. Jake says he want to fight the Condesce when she arrives in three years, but Dirk warns him that many others have tried and failed to defeat her.
 * HS 6754 Dirk asks Jake what he remember about his grandma. Jake tells the story of the night she died. He found her dead with three large fang marks and a trail of blood coming from the forest. Then Jake's house explodes and he is forced to burn his grandma's corpse and live in his room globe that he found in the forest and had survived the explosion mostly intact.
 * HS 6758 Dirk recounts to Jake what he has heard of his grandma. She was raised by the Baroness along with Jane's grandpa, but ran away at a young age. She took the last name English because of its sensitivity to the Baroness. She starts a competing technology corporation heavily branded in ways to make the Baroness angry.
 * HS 6760 Dirk explains that his and Roxy's ancestors followed in Jake's grandma's footsteps. Roxy's Mom wrote the Complacency of the Learned novels as an allegorical version of the Baroness's origins, while Dirk's Bro filled his Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff movie series with symbolism that mocked the Batterwitch and/or held a hidden message. Dirk offers to send Jake the entire series, noting that as part of the SBaHJ "experience", Bro made it all but impossible to actually buy the films.
 * HS 6763 Dirk continues to explain how his Bro and Roxy's Mom knew of his and Roxy's arrival in the future and made preparations for their survival. The two went on to lead a rebellion against the Condesce that ultimately failed and ended with their deaths, but also killed many of the enemy's celebrity allies. He goes on to explain how the Condesce's plans were aided by sympathizers, including Guy Fieri, who would be promoted to the Supreme Court while the other Justices mysteriously vanished, leaving him the sole Justice of the Supreme Court until he eventually became High Chaplain of Interstellar War. In this capacity, Fieri caused the deaths of five billion people, making him "the third and final Antichrist." Eventually democracy collapsed with the last free election electing Presidents Jay and Dope to become the first and final Dual-Presidents of the United States.
 * HS 6766 Dirk elaborates on how the nation descended into chaos after the Jay and Dope become the Presidents. After the Presidents set up death camps to eliminate all those deemed insufficiently mirthful, Bro had enough of them, and challenged them to a duel. He killed both of them, then rose into the air riding his Unreal Air, as he was never seen again.
 * HS 6769 Dirk explains that Roxy's Mom was taking down the High Chaplain, Guy Fieri. She gouged his eyes with a pair of needles and rode his torso to the bottom of the bloody falls.
 * HS 6772 Dirk speculates on what happened to the ancestors after they defeated the sympathizers. With her human puppet rulers dead, the Condesce seized control of the planet directly, and it is likely that Mom and Bro confronted and fought her. However, the Condesce's power levels would have been impossible to defeat in combat, so the two almost certainly died fighting.
 * HS 6775 Dirk and Jake continue conversing, and Dirk soon reveals to Jake that he is in a dream bubble. He tells Jake that he is neither asleep nor Dirk's dead dream self, that he is a seperate version of Dirk that exists only in Jake's mind. He goes on to explain that Heroes of Heart live a splintered existence and walk the path of self, and that Pages have a lot of untapped potential. A branch of one of the trees from Terezi's forest is seen crawling up the staircase, indicating that Terezi and Aranea may be visiting Jake's dream bubble.
 * HS 6776 Projected Dirk asks Jake if he wants to discuss his feelings towards the real Dirk; Jake declines as he is uncomfortable talking about it. Projected Dirk informs Jake that the spider ghost will be arriving soon.
 * HS 6777 Aranea arrives and Jake is too nervous to talk to her properly. The situation is worsened as Projected Dirk berates Jake for being so nervous. He threatens to take control of Jake's mind and give him a boner in front of Aranea if he can't start talking to her, but when Jake proves defiant, he leaves in disgust.
 * HS 6778 Jack Noir awakens in a jail cell on Prospit. There are no useful items to escape with, what looks like a key on the ground is just a crude drawing, and there is definitely no Pumpkin - until one is appearified into the cell as food for Jack.
 * HS 6783 Jack refuses to eat the pumpkin and looks outside, where he sees a single guard on watch. He shouts obscenities at the guard, but gets no reaction.
 * HS 6786 Jack inspects the pumpkin and finds a message from the Courtyard Droll carved on its side. It tells him to look inside the pumpkin. Jack speculates it may be something useful, such as a bomb. However, based on the Droll's previously displayed character traits and level of intelligence, the object inside the pumpkin might not in fact be useful at all.