Dirk Strider


 * For the pre-Scratch version of this character, see Bro.

Dirk Strider is Dave's Bro in the post-Scratch universe. Prior to his proper introduction to the reader, he is referred to by Jane as "D. Strider", and later by Roxy as "di stri". His name may also be a reference to Bro's use of shitty swords (A dirk is a kind of blade, specifically a Celtic dagger).

His chumhandle is timaeusTestified, in line with the rule that post-scratch kids have the same chumhandle abbreviation as their corresponding pre-scratch kid's ectobiological sibling. This completes the set of chumhandles when added to GT, GG, and TG.

He uses the same color text that Davesprite uses, similarly to how Jane and Jake use the same colors as Nannasprite and Jadesprite, respectively. He also signed the book that he sent to Jane in orange pen.

Personality
He appears to enjoy criticizing Jake's infatuation with the fictional character Neytiri, apparently referring to the character as HS 6071 ("a gigantic shitty space furry.") This may be a reference to the fact that Jade is now (quite literally) a gigantic space furry, as seen in the Cascade Flash. He seems to be a fan of horses, judging by his room being filled with horse and pony themed posters. He also watches "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" although he claims his interest is purely of academic nature, he does however admit he likes the character 'Rainbow Dash', since HS 6427 ("she is so spunky. <3") He also owns a tiny Maplehoof, who in her new size resembles a MLP figurine. He seems to be more laid back and less hot-headed than Dave.

Dirk seems to have a high interest in teaching his friends lessons to aid them in their personal development, such as when he insists Jake fights Brobot for Uranium as a consequence of having wasted his own Uranium thoughtlessly. He tries to make Jake more skeptical, because he is very naive; while the opposite holds true for Jane, who he criticised for her extreme skepticism. This results in him coming off as obnoxious at times. Like his pre-scratch self, he has a big interest in smuppets and puppets in general (although it seems this interest has expanded into the field of robotics). He is also known to enjoy "legendary infinite showers".

Biography
He, like Jake and Roxy, gave Jane a bunny for her thirteenth birthday, though he had to build it from scratch, unlike the others. It was HS 6029 ("...somewhat less innocuous") than the other two bunnies and is HS 6142 ("such a little troublemaker"). His bunny contains the original Con Air bunny which he stole from his Bro's museum.

He also has an auto-responder, an application designed to simulate Dirk's otherwise inimitably rad typing style, tone, cadence, personality, and substance of retort while he is away from the computer. The algorithms were originally guaranteed to be 96% indistinguishable from Dirk's native neurological responses, based on HS 6085 (statistical analysis), which means that the percentage can change (and does, dropping to 93% upon Jake's continued probing). Jake expresses frustration with it, but Jane seems to like it.

His Dream Self on Derse has apparently been awake for years, much like Dave's was, although Dave was not aware of it. He has been using his Dream Self to gather information on Derse, and to watch over Roxy's sleepwalking Dream Self. His Dream Self is seen covered in blood, probably from evading an assassination attempt by the Agents of the new Queen of Derse.

Relationships
As Dave before him, he seems to have had a strained relationship with his older "Bro", who has since passed away. Unlike Dave, he held the lack of brotherly brawls against his Bro, forcing him to HS 6368 (BUILD ROBOTS, SET THEM TO KILL MODE, AND SPAR WITH THEM TO DEATH) instead. Post-scratch Dave has made it very clear to Dirk that he is not his real older brother, but related to him through HS 006157 ("an esoteric process of genetic reamalgamation.") Jane also believes that he is a bit bitter about his bro's success with Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff the Moive [sic], although he would never admit it.

Dirk may have a romantic interest in Jake. Dirk's auto-responder has alluded to this, having started out as an exact replica of his thirteen-year-old self, which indicates that Dirk's romantic interest in Jake has been going on for at least three years. This should, however, be taken with a grain of salt until Dirk himself confirms his interest in Jake, as it has been suspected his auto-responder could very well be pulling some ironic scheme. Despite that possibility, Dirk currently is very likely to indeed harbor these feelings for Jake. Although this may not hold true after 3 years, the auto responder has also stated that he has continued flirting with him over these 3 years and seems to be about to make a romantic overture in his direction just like it would have done in Dirk's place.

However, Dirk may not accept the term "gay" as a label, expressing that it does not have to be 'a thing.' This would fit the Alternian influence on the post-Scratch Earth, as trolls have no concept of any specific sexuality. Roxy, though at one time harboring an interest in Dirk, has settled for a close platonic relationship.

Trivia

 * [[Image:DSsymbols.gif|right]]His shirt features a picture of a cap, reminiscent of Bro's headwear and similar in shape to Dave's record symbol.
 * Like Dave's hair, Dirk's hair is a stylized bird.
 * He is the only male character to have the same two letters for Pesterchum initials.
 * His chumhandle is most likely a reference to Plato's dialogue, Timaeus, which discusses the demiurge, a god-like being who created the universe as a sort of living creature. The Timaeus dialogue, alongside Critias, also introduces the mythology behind Atlantis.
 * Dirk has a map of Atlantis in his room. And when his first name is finally revealed, it's noted that HS 6367 (the last two letters) of "Dirk" are diluvian (relating to floods). This is because r and k are the last two letters of "Ark" and Atlantis is often referred to as the "Antediluvian World".
 * Timaeus is also a biblical character in the Gospel of Mark who is the father of a man whose blindness was cured by Jesus.
 * His affinity for HS 6354 (robots and horses) and his interest in HS 6425 (looking STRONG) resemble those of Equius.
 * He appears to, like Dave, be surrounded by feathery assholes; only they are white seagulls instead of black crows.
 * Not only are the Pesterchum handles switched between Dirk and Roxy, but their literacy is as well; Dirk's commentary is as grammatically correct (if more prone to ironic puppet references) as Rose's, while Roxy's is devoid of the same punctuation as Dave's (with the added typos from frequent intoxication).
 * His title is likely the Prince of Heart, from the same type of clues left in the introductions of Jane, Roxy and Jake.
 * Dirk appears to own a Sendificator, as he occasionally sendificates some of his robots to his friends.
 * Similar to Roxy, it is the only Crockercorp tech he uses.
 * HS 6386 ([S] Roxy: Sleepwalk) reveals that both Roxy and Dirk have eyes that match the color of their pesterchum text.
 * Dirk uses a strife specibus called fncysntakind, which is a direct reference to the Fancy Santas in Problem Sleuth.
 * Dirk has HS 6426 (a Hella Jeff tattoo) on his shoulder, complete with jpeg artifacts.