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Various kinds of food and beverages of both major and minor significance appear throughout MS Paint Adventures.

In Jailbreak[]

Judging by the full effectiveness of their bodily functions, Jailbreak's prisoners seem to get plenty to eat and drink. The nutrient richness of the jail's soilMspa icon.png may have something to do with this.

Human babies (but not childrenMspa icon.png!) seem to be considered a delicacyMspa icon.png for at least some elves. Their drink of choice, thankfully, would appear to be a much less gruesome pot of tea.Mspa icon.png Ponies, of course, love carrots.Mspa icon.png

Pumpkins start appearing in the first pageMspa icon.png of Jailbreak. They look deliciousMspa icon.png, but are best eaten in small pieces so as to fit through the mouth hole of a pumpkin helmet.Mspa icon.png

In Bard Quest[]

A friendly butcher ran a meat shopMspa icon.png in the Bard's kingdom; however the city ordinance against homosexuality barred him from selling any dildos. T-bone steaksMspa icon.png on the other hand seemed to be in plentiful supply.

In Problem Sleuth[]

Problem Sleuth, Ace Dick and Pickle Inspector all frequently used candy for various purposes, including as ammunition for their candy weaponryMspa icon.png and as part of their Gambit Schema. Mobster Kingpin had a propensity for candy liquorsMspa icon.png (SUGAR FREE, of course, on account of his diabetes), a kind of which could also be made from candy cornMspa icon.png. These beverages tended to greatly incraseMspa icon.png the imagination gauge.

On the arguably healthier side, in addition to a bag of his favourite candy corn Problem Sleuth imagined a pair of steak dinnersMspa icon.png in his imaginary office. Fiend muttonMspa icon.png is supposedly the meat of beasts, while brutesteakMspa icon.png could be either the favoured food or literal flesh of the Kingpin's Hired Muscle.

Straddling the border between food and beverage, the jocose honey used for the Comb Rave technique was served in receptacles resembling those used for drinksMspa icon.png. Death preferred to serve teaMspa icon.png to his guests.

In the four kingdoms[]

Each of the races of the four kingdoms had their own preferred food. Hogs, in addition to presumably subsisting on slopMspa icon.png, coveted the salted melonsMspa icon.png grown in the kingdom of the weasels, who preferred to eat elf eggsMspa icon.png. To the elves, the pieMspa icon.png baked by the clowns (the fillingMspa icon.png of which also used in the casting of some Combat Operandi, and as a weapon of its ownMspa icon.png by Demonhead Mobster Kingpin) was a delicacy. The flesh of the clowns themselves was also good enough to serve as foodMspa icon.png for Zombie Ace Dick.

In Homestuck[]

Cake[]

One of the more prominent foods in Homestuck is cake. The first instance of cake comes from John's father cooking several birthday cakes for him from Betty Crocker mixes and strewn about the house. In fact, John has to remove a cake from atop his Magic Chest, just in order to retrieve his Arms. Upon entry into the medium, such confections instead come from Nannasprite, though similarly en masse. Appropriately, Jane Crocker has also been shown fond of baking them, and prepared one for her own birthday party as well, though it was promptly thrown skyward along with the table it was residing on in a fit of rage. Meenah Peixes also likes to bake cakes, similar to her post-scratch's self's alias of Betty Crocker.

Pumpkins[]

Main article: Pumpkin

Pumpkins have been seen as a source of food for Exiles such as Wayward Vagabond and other Carapacians such as those taken care of by Roxy Lalonde. They have also been grown by Jade Harley and Jake English though their propensity for disappearance have likely prevented any intended consumption.

Fruit[]

Fruits.gif

Apples, oranges, lemons, and limes have all been seen to have been grown by Jade Harley, though the presence of faces may lessen the likelihood that these were meant as food. Jake also has similar fruit in his possession.

Candy[]

Main article: Candy

Canned Food[]

A large stash of canned food is found by the Wayward Vagabond. The foods found were: Beans, Mustard, Gravy, Bread, Shrimp, Asparagus, Cheese, Rice, Corn, Peas, Flour, Chestnuts, Mayo, Ham, Potatoes, and Squash. These foods were later used to build Can Town, as well as to make the Wayward Vagabond's MAYOR sash.

Doritos[]

They are featured in the gameHS.svg Dave played on Bro's Xbox.

Orange Creamsicles[]

MentionedHS.svg by Terezi when being trolled by Davesprite. Like cotton candy, orange creamsicles seem to be a universal constant.

Steaks[]

Meat.png

Like any good omnipotent dog, Becquerel has a love for irradiated steaks that are made from Jade's Cookalizer. Caliborn and Calliope were also given a plenty supply of meat during their childhood, told to be regular cherub nutrition.

Pet treats[]

Pet-treats.png

Joey Claire owned a bag of pet treats for her dog, Tesseract. It is used in a strife to distract one of the monsters out of the room and later is carried with Joey to Alternia.

Xefros's Lusus' diet is mainly based on sloth food and refuses to eat most of his owner's food, while Jude's pidgeons like crackers.

Spice[]

A shaker full of SEASON-ALL MAGIC SPICE MIX. This doggone powder adds the taste of flavor to every bite.

Soda[]

Ecto-cooler[]

Ecto-cooler is mentioned in the commercial that plays as John is leaving his house for the first timeHS.svg, and is related to John's fascination with Ghostbusters.

Faygo[]

bottled miracles

Faygo (specifically Red Pop) is a soft drink available both on Alternia and on Earth. The drink is a noted as a favorite of Gamzee Makara, who consumes it as part of his cult's rituals. The consumption of it is referred to as "kicking the wicked elixir" or "rude elixir". Through a fetch modus mishap with his Miracle Modus, a bottle is accidentally launched far across the ocean, washing up on Eridan Ampora's island hive, much to his disgust.

Later, while in the midst of emotional theatrics, Eridan is advised by Gamzee to kick back and get his zone on with a cold bottle of Faygo. He indulges Gamzee, and his reaction to the taste of the sugary swill is indifferent.

In human society, Faygo is a sugary soft drink manufactured in Detroit, Michigan and made popular outside its distribution area by the musical group Insane Clown Posse, and a staple of juggalo subculture, on which Gamzee is based.

In the post-scratch universe, the Posse became Presidents of the United States thanks to the manipulations of the Condesce, and one of their actions in office was to replace all tap water with Faygo. Not surprisingly, this made type 2 diabetes so common that having it was considered the national pastime.

Karkat finding spilled Faygo next to an unconscious Terezi.

After Terezi forms a kismesissitude with Gamzee she also begins drinking Faygo, which she quickly becomes addicted to. It is discovered she finds it distasteful after Karkat finds her passed outHS.svg in a puddle of it surrounded by multiple empty bottles. Although she enjoyed it at first because of the good taste of its bright colors, it began to grow tasteless as she became more and more addicted to it.

Two types of Faygo have been seen in Homestuck, Redpop and Grape.

TaB[]

Main article: TaB

TaB is a sugar-free zero calorie diet cola and is drunk by the Wayward Vagabond in the Skyship Base, much to his subsequently placebo sugar-hyper delight. An Alternian variety shows that trolls have it as well, similar to the universality of cotton candy. Feferi is first seen opening a canHS.svg. One appears later on the Condesce's desk.HS.svg However, given that particular can's appearance it is likely she brought that one with her from post-scratch Earth, as it features earth writing instead of Daedric. It was apparently created by the Condesce as an attempt to curb the subjuggalator stranglehold on the soda market, and was advertised as being incredibly sugar-laden, despite being created with no actual sugar at all so that the Condesce could keep her slim figure. Some cans of the Alternian variety have been seen with horns, such as the one in Openbound.

Other[]

Dirk Strider also seems to have quite a collection of orange soda, some of which has made its way into his Sylladex. His sylladex features the brands: Minute Maid, Faygo, Crush, Fanta, Mountain Dew, Sunkist, Orangette, and Slice. Minute maid has a selection of different flavors/beverages, though Dirk has only been seen drinking Orange and Apple flavors.

Coffee[]

Dad Egbert and Draconian DignitaryHS.svg have been seen drinking coffee, as well as the residents of the Veil Meteor, albeit a very disgusting variety from a broken machine, that quickly accumulates an even more disgusting film over the surface.

Apple juice[]

Main article: Apple juice

Dave Strider is quite a fan of apple juice despite John pointing out its similar appearance to pee. Later on the Veil meteor, he asks Rose to create more apple juice for him to drink but she can't because they don't have any apples and she can't figure out how to alchemically combine anything to create something as ideologically indivisible as apples.

Milk[]

Equius Zahhak is rather fond of milk, though must be aided in order to drink it, as he tends to destroy the glass that holds it with his phenomenal and poorly-controlled strength. Andrew Hussie has also been seen with a glass, as well as unsuccessfully attempting to feed it to Spades Slick via a bottle while nursing him back to health. However, it should be noted that these instances of milk have originated not from cows or even goats, but from Aurthour, Equius's Lusus. Various trolls, including TereziHS.svg and MindfangHS.svg have also referred to Doc Scratch using milk as a descriptor for his way of speaking, suggesting the use of milk may be more widespread than has been seen.

Alcohol[]

Main article: Alcohol

Several alcoholic drinks have also been shown (albeit mostly in possession of Mom) including vodka, gin, wine, and the moonshine that Rose alchemizes for herself while on the Veil meteor. Rose's mom is also seen holding a martini.

Exclusively Non-Earth[]

Grub[]

Main article: Grub

BeefgrubHS.svg, a form of Alternian insectoid livestock, is used in the making of several butcher's creations such as grubsteak, and grubloaf, a leavenedHS.svg dish, typically covered in a sweet, tangy mucusHS.svg, and served with tuber pasteHS.svg, something likely similar to mashed potatoes.

Grub sauce is a grub-based condiment, often mistaken for blood and vice versa. Dave compares it to mayonnaiseHS.svg, stating the main differences are mayonnaise's lack of grubs and white complexion, meaning that grubsauce does in fact contain grubs, and appears a color other than white. If KarkatHS.svg and TereziHS.svg's earlier confusion/denials about Kanaya's death are of any indication, as well as again when talking of Sollux's deathHS.svg grubsauce seems to come in a range of at least yellow to jade.

Questionable Foodstuffs[]

Mind honey is a special honey used in Alternian apiculture networks, and is known for its mental stimulation capabilities. High level psionics (such as Sollux) should be wary about what effect this may have on their powers and sanity. Sollux has been seen to blow up Aradia's hive by ingesting this substance under Vriska's mind control of his own completely not free will.

At least one Alternian has been seen eating Sopor Slime, basically having the exact opposite effect as the aforementioned mind honey, one of causing mental torpor. The substance is typically absorbed dermally, used for bathing in while one sleeps to prevent torturous nightmares and ease slumber, and one is taught very young by one's lusus not to ingest it. However, in cases of parental neglect, one might never learn this, and instead bake it into pies, washing it down with a bottle of Faygo.

Oblong Meat Product[]

In Hiveswap and Hiveswap Friendship Simulator, Diemen Xicali is particularly infatuated with his "oblong meat product", a type of Troll hotdog analog. The precise content of the meat is unknown to even him, however.

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