dear god. and just what are you supposed to be?
April 13, 2018 (Steam)
Hiveswap Friendship Simulator: Volume One, entited "Of Bloodthirst and Bratwurst", is the first installment of Hiveswap Friendship Simulator, a series of "loosely-canonical" Hiveswap spinoff visual novels in the style of dating sim games, but termed "friendship simulators" instead due to their focus on platonic friendships instead of romance. The befriendable characters in this installment (first introduced in the Troll Call) are Ardata Carmia, a blue blood psychic who makes sadistic web videos, and Diemen Xicali, a rust blood obsessed with hot dogs. The game was written by Andrew Hussie, and primarily developed and programmed by David Turnbull using the Ren'Py game engine.
Volume One was announced on April 3, 2018 alongside a trailer, and released on Steam ten days later on April 13th for $0.99. The game possesses an ESRB rating of Mature 17+, suitable for ages 17 and up, for containing "violence, blood and gore, and strong language." Volume One serves as the base Friendsim game on Steam, with future volumes to be released as DLC for Volume One.
You (depicted as a generic character in the style of the MSPA Reader) crash your spaceship on Alternia, leaving you in need of food, medical attention for your broken arm and ribs, and - most importantly - friendship. One of two trolls approaches, and you attempt to befriend them.
Each character's storyline has three possible endings: two "bad" endings where you do not befriend the troll (one of which occurs right at the storyline's beginning) and one "good" ending where you do befriend them.
Regarding you with a mix of disgust and amusement, Ardata says she will consider becoming your friend if you agree to do whatever she asks you to, including eating whatever she chooses to feed you. She asks how you feel about the idea.
- If you only begrudgingly agree to this arrangement, she angrily tells you to leave. REJECTION!!!
- If you agree without complaint, she brings you inside her hive and into a dungeon, where she has imprisoned other trolls in cages and set up an array of cameras to film the captives. Showing you over to a box containing an unassembled table, she hands you a screwdriver and orders you to put it together while she films you. Though you don't enjoy assembling furniture, your new "friend" can use her psychic powers to detect any negative thoughts you have, so you begin the task. Every single screw requires an allen wrench, not a screwdriver, but there is no wrench nearby. You must decide what to do now.
- If you choose to give up on the table and escape the dungeon, you throw the screwdriver at Ardata and make a run for it, but she uses a rust blooded captive's telekinetic powers to stab the screwdriver into your leg and cause you to fall down the stairs. Using mind control, she forces you to carry her up the stairs, bring her to the kitchen and prepare a meat dish for her before giving you autonomy again. You cautiously feed her the meat, and afterwards she laughs for a moment before beginning to cry. Ardata reveals that she has growing doubts about continuing to make sadistic videos, but her online brand is entirely built around that type of content, and doing anything else would result in her fans abandoning her; her only option is to keep up her sinister persona until she is finally old enough to leave Alternia. After mind controlling you into stabbing her in the hand with a fork, she realizes that you are the only person who ever genuinely tried to befriend her and so agrees to be your friend. As a "reward," she makes you eat the inedible gristle on her plate. FRIIIENDSHIIIP!
- If you try to build the table anyway, you struggle to complete the assembly by twisting each screw in by hand. After an hour, the table is wobbly but complete, save for one screw that rolled under a piece of furniture. Ardata releases one of her captives from his cage and has you strap him onto the table; she then deposits a tick-like lusus on top of him, and it begins to drink his blood. You are ordered to retrieve the last screw and put it in place, but while under the table the shoddy construction and the weight of the troll and tick cause it to collapse on top of you, shattering your pelvis and pinning you beneath it. Flailing around, you accidentally stab the tick with the screwdriver, then free yourself from the table by grabbing onto the lusus and getting pulled by it as it thrashes around. You are dragged upstairs and right to the front door, but when the tick abruptly stops there you are catapulted outside and land fifty yards away. You look back to see Ardata flip you off and declare that you will not be her friend. REJECTION!!!
Diemen is initially skeptical of your intentions, believing that you may be trying to steal his prized hot dog. Though you are hungry, you insist that your only intention is to befriend him, and must decide how best to convey that intent.
- If you ask him for a bite of his hot dog, he leaves forever. DISRESPECTFUL.
- If you ask him if he lives nearby, he explains that he is homeless after his hive was bombed by Imperial Drones during a culling, and he is now dependent on scrounging and deceiving others to get his meals. You offer to try and help him improve his life, but he thinks you are trying to be too friendly too quickly and asks you to slow down a bit, a request you attempt to comply with. Returning to the topic of his hive, he tearfully reveals that his lusus was killed in the bombing, and you decide to try and comfort him.
- If you pat Diemen on the back, he calms down and fantasizes that, with the authorities now likely thinking him killed during the culling, he could live off the grid and avoid being sent off-world. Realizing that your arm is injured, he takes off his shirt so you can make a sling out of it, and you begin to wonder if Diemen is interested in more than just friendship. He offers to share the hot dog with you and the two of you begin to eat it simultaneously from opposite ends, Lady and the Tramp style. Just before your mouths touch, however, you get too much hot dog in your mouth and cough it up onto his face, causing him to start choking on his half. You attempt to perform the Heimlich maneuver with one broken arm and eventually succeed in dislodging the hot dog, but the force of the expulsion sends you both careening down a hill, and you land ass-first on Diemen's face and break his neck, killing him instantly. As you try to hide the body in a nearby bush, Ardata catches you and says that she'll take care of the situation. YOU KILLED HIM!!
- If you hug him, your arm involuntarily jerks up in pain and knocks the hot dog out of his hand. You try to catch it before it hits the ground but only end up falling on it and squishing it. You are left embarrassed as Diemen gives an over-the-top horrified reaction, but you come up with a way of salvaging the friendship. Offering to get him another hot dog, you have him follow you on an improvised path through the neighborhood, having no idea where you're going but pretending that you do. The journey brings you into the sewers, and after an hour of aimless trudging underground Diemen is worn down by exhaustion and the foul stench and decides to give up on the search. Though he didn't get his new hot dog, he is moved by the amount of effort you put into helping him and agrees to be your friend. Suddenly, an Imperial Drone appears in the sewer, forcing you both to make a hasty retreat. After saving your friend from a river of sludge, the two of you climb up a ladder and end up inside a building. Diemen says that this adventure has made realize that there's more to life than hot dogs - until you both realize that the room you are in is a meat locker filled with sausages. You tearfully embrace, celebrating the happiest day of your lives. MEAT HEAVEN!!!
- Several assets used in Volume 1 (such as the character select screen) were changed with the release of Volume 2. The new character select screen was in line with the ones seen in later volumes.
|Hiveswap and Hauntswitchv · d · e|
|Playable Kids||Joey Claire · Jude Harley|
|Playable Trolls||Xefros Tritoh · Dammek|
|Supporting Humans||Babysitter · Pa Harley · A. Claire · Mysterious Cult|
|Supporting Trolls||Trizza Tethis · Cridea Jeevik|
|Troll Call Trolls||Zebede Tongva · Tyzias Entykk · Mallek Adalov · Daraya Jonjet · Barzum Soleil · Baizli Soleil · Nihkee Moolah · Chahut Maenad · Diemen Xicali · Skylla Koriga · Folykl Darane · Kuprum Maxlol · Charun Krojib · Amisia Erdehn · Polypa Goezee · Tegiri Kalbur · Tirona Kasund · Lynera Skalbi · ?????? Elwurd · Galekh Xigisi · Vikare Ratite · Boldir Lamati · Cirava Hermod · Tagora Gorjek · Ardata Carmia · Marvus Xoloto · Fozzer Velyes · Stelsa Sezyat · Wanshi Adyata · Bronya Ursama · Chixie Roixmr · Zebruh Codakk · Azdaja Knelax · Konyyl Okimaw · Karako Pierot · Marsti Houtek · Lanque Bombyx · Remele Namaaq|
|Other||Tesseract · The Lone Gunbirds · Green shadow monsters · Imperial Drone · Zoosmell · Cornibuster · Doc Scratch|
|Concepts||Troll · Extended Zodiac · Cherub Portal · Abilitech · Prongle · Scythian · Achievements|
|Locations (Earth)||Hauntswitch · Half-Harley Manor|
|Locations (Alternia)||Outglut · Dammek's hive · Xefros' hive|
|Acts||Hiveswap: Act 1|
|Additional Media||Hiveswap Friendship Simulator (Vol. 1 · Vol. 2 · Vol. 3 · Vol. 4 · Vol. 5 · Vol. 6 · Vol. 7 · Vol. 8 · Vol. 9 · Vol. 10 · Vol. 11 · Vol. 12 · Vol. 13 · Vol. 14 · Vol. 15 · Vol. 16 · Vol. 17 · Vol. 18)|