The dangerous band of mobsters threaten you with their sinister shadow-based magic. Mspa icon.png

The Midnight Crew is a group of antagonists originally paid to appear in Problem Sleuth through a donation by Mayonaka, their original designer during a series of tabletop games. However, since their use in Andrew's following adventure Homestuck, they have grown to be major characters within the story.

Biography[edit | edit source]

In Problem Sleuth[edit | edit source]

First appearing in extra episode 13, they were summoned by Problem Sleuth to take on Demonhead Mobster Kingpin, but then changed their alliances to DMK's side due to a slight mishap with a set of some Hunk Rump cards. The crew members are all based on one of the four suits in a deck of cards respectively, with the exception of Mobster Kingpin, who was not an original member of the crew.

In Homestuck[edit | edit source]

In Homestuck, the Midnight Crew were created from the same character templates as Jack Noir and his Agents in the trolls' Sburb session, and became exiled to the trolls' planet, Alternia. Spades Slick, possibly with the help of the rest of the crew, proceeded to make this townHS.svg, rebuilding society in the style of a noir cityscape, naming it Midnight City, and began to run all types of criminal operations parallel to the Felt. The Midnight Crew were four of the exiles that helped the trolls with their session of the game.

Each member of the crew comes equipped with five weapon slots and one inventory slot, much akin to how Problem Sleuth characters would have five inventory slots and one weapon slot. Their hats default to having color-based candy stored inside of them already, and that slot is not shown when interacting with their inventory as it is assumed you would never want to take them out from the hat anyway. The five weapon slots all carry various weapons, and all the weapons suffer from that pretty annoying and kinda dumb glitch in the form of playing cards, which each crew member holds in their inventory slot. The deck of cards is used as a container for even more weapons, or sometimes it is used as a prison for those who need to be kept alive until a later date.

The ace card of each member's particular suit is their weapon of choice, which they often use in a very violent fashion. Curiously, other cards can be combined to make new items, such as combining the ten of spades and four of diamonds (Ten-Four) to make a communication radio that can be used to talk to other crew members.

Members[edit | edit source]

Spades Slick[edit | edit source]

The leader of the group. He wields the Cast Iron Horse Hitcher and his secondary weapons are knives and blades. He has a low tolerance for a lot of things, but he especially hates clocks. He is violent and resentful, but very capable and extremely dangerous. He has no patience for the Felt's time shenanigans, and although he does not appear to have a particularly well thought-out strategy in mind when dealing with complex conflicts, his methods are nevertheless effective. The exile of Karkat Vantas.

Hearts Boxcars[edit | edit source]

The tall, brawny-looking member of the group. He wields a TV antenna and his secondary weapons are axes and maces. He is the safe cracker of the team, opening safes using a less conventional method: tearing them right off the wall using his brute strength. His jaw can expand to a frightening degree, demonstrating this ability by biting and swallowing Eggs' head right off of his shoulders. Hearts is also known for the fact that he ALWAYS ROLLS BOXCARSMspa icon.png. The exile of Tavros Nitram.

Diamonds Droog[edit | edit source]

The tall, intimidating looking fellow of the group. He wields the Ultra-Violence Cuestick and is also associated with guns. Little is known about him, though he appears to have an extremely short temper. Despite his perceived anger issues, he is rather intelligent and cunning, being able to use the time powers of the Felt against them, and maintaining his composure and formulating an effective strategy while dealing with all of the Felt's time bullshit. The exile of Aradia Megido.

Clubs Deuce[edit | edit source]

A short and stout crew member. He wields the Crook of Felony, along with an assortment of other clubs, including the notably spectacular Bull Penis Cane. He is also the Midnight Crew's demolitions expert, and carries a number of bombs on his person. He has an innocent, child-like personality, taking simple, purposeless tasks very seriously, though his ability to perform these tasks is up for debate. He appears to have a terrible memory. The exile of Sollux Captor.

Shadow Mobster Kingpin[edit | edit source]

Shadow Mobster Kingpin

Mobster Kingpin who has been enveloped in a shadow by Spades Slick, seeing as Spades Slick thought the original MK was not quite cutting it somehow to join their group. He is not a part of the Midnight Crew in the Homestuck universe, probably to differentiate between the two adventures.

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The quickest way of dealing with the Midnight Crew would of course be to just let PS unsummon them. Nobody would ever think of doing that though.
  • The Midnight Crew adventure exists inside Homestuck. The URL is clearly visible on this pageHS.svg, and if someone actually went to that page with their own browser, it features a spade caked in bloodMspa icon.png.
  • The name "Midnight Crew" has been in use as early as 1909 in a song by ragtime-era singer Eddie Morton, entitled "I'm a Member of the Midnight Crew". The thematic similarities shared with the song are a coincidence, but its chorus was sampled in the background music for [S] Jack: AscendHS.svg and can be found in its complete length in [S] Terezi: Play records.HS.svg An acapella version is a track on Volume Eight and was used in [S] DD: Ascend more casually.HS.svg
  • Mayonaka's original idea about the Midnight Crew involved them having a leader, Prof. Mayonaka, who was the arch-nemesis of Lord English. After the Midnight Crew Intermission, Mayonaka created a non-canon adventure about the Felt which partially explored this idea. Mayonaka's pendant appears twice in theHS.svg comicHS.svg as a shout-out to the Midnight Crew's original creator.
    • Oddly enough, the oil retcon is absent from the books except on the page where it covers Mayonaka's pendant.
  • Spades Slick's hat appears to be a wide-brimmed fedora. Droog's hat appears to be a homburg. Boxcars appears to be wearing an akubra. Deuce appears to be wearing a Boss of the Plains hat or sombrero cordobés. Mobster Kingpin appears to be wearing a trilby.
  • According to the Machine of Death mission book, the Midnight Crew takes place in "Noir 1922".
    • 1922 occurs between the recession era, where Problem Sleuth also takes place.


Works by Andrew Hussie
MS Paint Adventures JailbreakBard QuestProblem Sleuth (Midnight Crew)HomestuckRyanquest
Team Special Olympics BlurbScriblettesWhistlesAnd It Don't StopNeon Ice Cream Headache
Videogames Namco HighHiveswapHiveswap Friendship SimulatorPesterquestPsycholonials
Other Barty AndersonJandrew EditsWizardologyParadox SpaceThe Homestuck EpiloguesHomestuck^2: Beyond Canon
Problem Sleuth Characters
Team Sleuth
Problem Sleuth - Ace Dick - Pickle Inspector
Hysterical Dame - Nervous Broad
Four kingdoms
Elves - Hogs - Weasels - Clowns
The Four Heroes
Villains
Mobster Kingpin - Madame Murel - Demonhead Mobster Kingpin
Deities
Death - Godhead Pickle Inspector - Demimonde Goddess - The Devil
Allies
The Whale - Candy Mecha - Hearst - Hired Muscle - Honeybee Professor
Minions
Beasts - Whores - Thugs - Worker Bees - Courtesan Angels
Non-Canon
Midnight Crew (Spades Slick - Diamonds Droog - Hearts Boxcars - Clubs Deuce)
Laborer Wasps - Professor Wasp - Zombie Astronaut - Little White Cat - Fuzzy Man Bear and Sarah

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Homestuck Characters
Pre-scratch
Kids
Heir of Breath Breath Aspect.svg Seer of Light Light Aspect.svg Knight of Time Time Aspect.svg Witch of Space Space Aspect.svg
JohnLogo.svg John Egbert RoseLogo.svg Rose Lalonde DaveLogoSlashed.png Dave Strider JadeLogo.png Jade Harley
ectoBiologist [EB]
ghostyTrickster [GT]
tentacleTherapist [TT] turntechGodhead [TG] gardenGnostic [GG]
Post-scratch
Kids
Maid of Life Life Aspect.svg Rogue of Void Void Aspect.svg Prince of Heart Heart Aspect.svg Page of Hope Hope Aspect.svg
JaneLogo.png Jane Crocker RoxyLogo.png Roxy Lalonde DirkLogo.png Dirk Strider JakeLogo.png Jake English
gutsyGumshoe [GG] tipsyGnostalgic [TG] timaeusTestified [TT] golgothasTerror [GT]
Post-scratch
Trolls
Maid of Time Time Aspect.svg Page of Breath Breath Aspect.svg Mage of Doom Doom Aspect.svg Knight of Blood Blood Aspect.svg
Aries.svg Aradia Megido Taurus.svg Tavros Nitram Gemini.svg Sollux Captor Cancer.svg Karkat Vantas
apocalypseArisen [AA] adiosToreador [AT] twinArmageddons [TA] carcinoGeneticist [CG]
Rogue of Heart Heart Aspect.svg Sylph of Space Space Aspect.svg Seer of Mind Mind Aspect.svg Thief of Light Light Aspect.svg
Leo.svg Nepeta Leijon Virgo.svg Kanaya Maryam Libra.svg Terezi Pyrope Scorpio.svg Vriska Serket
arsenicCatnip [AC] grimAuxiliatrix [GA] gallowsCalibrator [GC] arachnidsGrip [AG]
Heir of Void Void Aspect.svg Bard of Rage Rage Aspect.svg Prince of Hope Hope Aspect.svg Witch of Life Life Aspect.svg
Sagittarius.svg Equius Zahhak Capricorn.svg Gamzee Makara Aquarius.svg Eridan Ampora Pisces.svg Feferi Peixes
centaursTesticle [CT] terminallyCapricious [TC] caligulasAquarium [CA] cuttlefishCuller [CC]
Pre-scratch
Trolls
Witch of Time Time Aspect.svg Rogue of Breath Breath Aspect.svg Heir of Doom Doom Aspect.svg Seer of Blood Blood Aspect.svg
Aries.svg Damara Megido Taurus.svg Rufioh Nitram Gemini.svg Mituna Captor Kankri Vantas
Mage of Heart Heart Aspect.svg Maid of Space Space Aspect.svg Knight of Mind Mind Aspect.svg Sylph of Light Light Aspect.svg
Leo.svg Meulin Leijon Virgo.svg Porrim Maryam Libra.svg Latula Pyrope Scorpio.svg Aranea Serket
Page of Void Void Aspect.svg Prince of Rage Rage Aspect.svg Bard of Hope Hope Aspect.svg Thief of Life Life Aspect.svg
Sagittarius.svg Horuss Zahhak Capricorn.svg Kurloz Makara Aquarius.svg Cronus Ampora Pisces.svg Meenah Peixes
Cherubs
Muse of Space Space Aspect.svg Lord of Time Time Aspect.svg
Calliope symbol.png Calliope (Alt) Caliborn symbol.png Caliborn
uranianUmbra [UU] undyingUmbrage [uu]
Guardians
Dad Roxy Lalonde
(pre-scratch)
Dirk Strider
(pre-scratch)
Becquerel
God Cat Rose Lalonde
(post-scratch)
Dave Strider
(post-scratch)
Brobot
Supporting
Characters
Jane Egbert Jaspers Lil Cal Jake Harley
John Crocker Mutie Lil Hal Jade English
Sprites
Nannasprite Jaspersprite Calsprite
Davesprite
Jadesprite
Tavrisprite
Gcatavrosprite
Fefetasprite
Jasprosesprite^2
Arquiusprite Erisolsprite
Davepetasprite^2
Carapacians /
Exiles
Wayward Vagabond Peregrine Mendicant Aimless Renegade Windswept Questant Writ Keeper
Agents
Jack Noir (B2) (Dead Session) Draconian Dignitary (B2) Hegemonic Brute Courtyard Droll
Midnight Crew
Spades Slick Diamonds Droog Hearts Boxcars Clubs Deuce
The Felt
Lord English Doc Scratch Snowman
Denizens
Typheus Cetus Hephaestus Echidna
Hemera Nix Yaldabaoth Abraxas
Consorts
Salamanders Turtles Crocodiles Iguanas
Underlings
Imps Ogres Basilisks Liches Giclopses
Other Black QueenBlack KingSkaian armiesGenesis FrogLususAncestors (The Condesce)HorrorterrorsBetty CrockerColonel SassacreCaseyGuy FieriInsane Clown PosseMaplehoofRambunctious CrowHalleySerenityMSPA ReaderMs. PaintAndrew HussieSawtoothSquarewaveHis Honorable TyrannyCalliope and Caliborn's parentsAngelsFantrolls

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