Pesterquest: Volume 7, entitled 'Dragons and Dairy', is the seventh installment of Pesterquest, a Homestuck spinoff visual novel. The befriendable characters in the seventh installment are Equius Zahhak and Terezi Pyrope. Volume 7 Route 1 was written by Lalo Hunt while Volume 7 Route 2 was written by Sarah Zedig. Volume 7 was released on November 13, 2019.
Volume 7 Route 1: Begin The Friendship Process
Proud that you've been able to make so many friends on Alternia, you wonder where you should go to evade the rising sun. However, you would rather spend time with someone less intense and mess around with your teleportation powers to see what sticks. Getting dejected with your inability to return home, you decide to visit someone Gamzee had once mentioned.
You appear right in front of Equius as he's sparring with a robot, startling the blueblood immensely. Not wanting to get punched in the face, you teleport to another part of his hive. Hearing a loud thunk from the room you'd just left makes you nervous, until a disgruntled sounding Equius asks that you show yourself. You weigh your options.
- If you choose to chicken out, you decide that maybe hanging out with Gamzee was better than meeting a pissed-off Equius. You forget that you can teleport due to fear, and run right into a brick wall. It turns out that the wall was Equius' lusus, and you slip on spilled milk right as the troll himself comes bursting through the door. The duo watch you flop around uselessly until your shame and humiliation forces you to zap outta dodge. HUMILIATED
- If you choose to be brave, you acknowledge that you should probably check on him, since it's your fault if Equius got injured. You politely knock on the door so as to not catch him off guard again, and he furiously demands that you explain yourself. It quickly becomes apparent that Equius is at a loss when addressing you, as he can't quite determine whether you're his superior or inferior without a caste symbol on your being. Attempting to talk about the other trolls you know doesn't help ease the tension, and you are thankful when his lusus shows up with glasses of milk and a towel for Equius. You drink the milk in one go, prompting Equius to view you in a better light. He then asks whether you're a hoofbeast art enthusiast, leading you into his room to have a gander. You spend a few moments taking in his respiteblock, getting quite creeped out by the massive pile of destroyed robots in the room. Equius wants you to prove that you and he have mutual acquaintances, allowing you to make use of his computer. You begin pestering Karkat, but since you're using Equius' troll handle, Karkat is absolutely confused by the 'change' in behavior. Feeling foolish, you clarify the situation to Karkat and hope that he could lend you a hand. Equius gets agitated with what Karkat said on your behalf, and quickly bids the lowblood goodbye. Since Karkat mentioned that you're the only one of your kind, Equius decides that it would be best if you provide him guidance on your species' way of communication. You're not entirely sure how to proceed.
- Should you choose to bond over the fact that you're both freaks, Equius gets offended with your insinuation. You then clarify that you'd thought Karkat was talking about Equius' broken horn, and decide to jump back in time to when Equius broke his horn just so you can know more about troll biology. However, you wind up being caught across space and settle down to watch events unfold in the meantime. You get to see different snapshots from Equius' life: him in the recent past and as a wiggler. Watching him break his horn in three different scenarios (exhaustion from sparring, falling off a stalagmite as a wiggler, getting struck by a scuttlebuggy when distracted) makes you cry out in shock, and you pop back into the present. Only then did you realize that you've altered the past to some degree, as you are now in Equius' past memories. Getting angry, Equius accuses you of not doing anything when you were there, and somehow still has the gall to attempt to be his friend. Flustered, you try to explain time travel to him, but he brushes you off. He glumly states that he doesn't believe friendship is on offer at the moment and asks that you leave. Dejected, you take your leave while he prepares for another sparring session. SHUNNED...
- Should you choose to show off your cool powers, Equius is open to the idea and openly wonders how you could've dipped in and out of space with such ease. After your demonstration, Equius hesitantly asks if it's possible for him to tag along. You offer your elbow in response, and wait for him to decide whether or not to visit someone. Unfortunately for him, you are unable to take him to Nepeta's place due to unknown reasons. While somewhat upset, Equius furnishes you with additional details so that you could hone in better on his moirail. You failed second attempt infuriates Equius to no end, and he demands that you try again. An unknown entity tells you that skipping ahead isn't allowed, and you land in a heap back in Equius' place. The blueblood takes his fury out on the robots strewn across the room, then apologizes for the violent display once he's done venting his anger. He explains that he'd never been able to visit Nepeta due to the distance, but grudgingly accepts the narrative entity's decision for the time being. Whilst chatting with him, Equius asks how you're able to be so sure of yourself despite being the only specimen of your kind—nothing to guide you on how to act and behave and so forth. Your explanation makes sense to him, though he still feels unsure whether to hide his unnatural immense strength or accept it as a part of himself. You joke that there's no chance of him accidentally hurting someone, unless they teleport right in front of his battle-bot as he's sparring. Laughing, Equius tells you to just zap to the front door next time and Arthour will be more than happy to let you in. e%cellent VICTORY!
Volume 7 Route 2: A Fair Trial
Strolling though a forest, you think about how your actions really can help your friends in the long run, especially those living on Alternia. Before your thoughts can get any more abysmal, you spot a treehouse in the distance. Then your vision goes black all of a sudden, leaving you quite confused. You aren't too thrilled with the prospect of someone addressing you as a criminal while you are tied to a chair in a dark room, so you try to zap away. When you are unable to extricate yourself from the current mess you've gotten into, you ask the troll what's with the getup. After a bit of banter, Terezi reveals herself and puts you right in the middle of her courtroom drama. She doesn't appreciate the way you keep interrupting her, and only gets more frustrated when someone starts pestering her the exact moment you decide to play along. While she's busy licking the screen of her computer, you contemplate the possibility of making an escape (sans your teleportation powers for the moment).
- If you choose to get some leverage to break the chair, you succeed in your attempt but get tripped up by the rope still binding your legs. Bowling into Terezi, the both of you go crashing though a window. Terrified, you cling to her and hope that the drop won't kill you. Your relief for not falling is immediately offset by the terrifying realization that you'd accidentally murdered Terezi—she'd accidentally threaded her neck through the noose in her room as she fell with you. Dread lining your stomach, you remark that this is beyond ridiculous. THE PROSECUTION RESTS IN PEACE
- If you choose to wait it out, a vaguely irritated Terezi informs you that she'd just dealt with an annoying someone and is now ready to prosecute you for your crimes. When Terezi tells you that your crime is existing, you begin to doubt whether she's actually a legislacerator in training since things don't make sense to you. Miffed, Terezi recites the relevant law just to shut you up. Impressed with her skill, you ask whether there's an appeals process. Ignoring what you'd just said, Terezi begins sniffing you up and down, stating that you'll have to do better if you wish to lie your way out of her court. However, she is stunned when she realizes Kanaya made the dress you're currently wearing. Despite the fact however, Terezi still detains you until she can prove that Kanaya didn't make you the dress under undue influence. Feeling angry all with the injustice of it all, you contemplate teleporting away, now that your head's cleared. But the notion of upholding the law just to dish out cruel punishment sticks in your craw, and you sit and wait as the coin falls through the air. Then you're right next to her, screaming as you snatch the coin out of the air and hurl it out the window. Shocked, Terezi demands to know why you're acting this way. Asking about how the law really works on Alternia makes her laugh, but you're unhappy with how screwed up the whole thing is. Going out on a limb, you ask whether she knows about Karkat's blood colour. She admits that she does, but makes an exception for him just so she can protect him as best as she can. She gloomily informs you that rather than get killed for saying the system's messed up, she can at least try to change things from the inside. Her words remind you of a certain someone, and you unintentionally zap into limbo once again. This time however, Terezi's with you and you tell her some of the things you do remember from your past shenanigans. Even though she's confident that she would be the one to succeed in her attempt, you remember that your past friends' devotion and hard work had failed miserably—Alternia seems worse than before. Your dour mood infects Terezi, but the two of you wind up chatting about mutual acquaintances all the same. Terezi admits that she doesn't really know what she's doing, and you want to comfort her.
- Should you choose to give her a distraction, you take her to Gamzee right as she starts weeping. Even though startling Gamzee seems pretty funny to you, Terezi isn't amused in the slightest. But when Gamzee offers some pie, she decides to throw caution to the wind and drink some Faygo. You join the two of them on the couch and take solace in the fact that Terezi's not that depressed now, even though she isn't all that happy either. WASTED
- Should you choose to give her a hug, Terezi opens up about the petty cycle of revenge she and her friend had to endure recently. She asks that you take her to Vriska's hive, and you watch silently as they make amends and promise to do good instead. SCOURGE SISTERS UNITE!
- When the MSPA Reader was aimlessly zapping from location to location, they appear in a forest, garden, cave, mall and an old watchtower.
- Karkat mistakenly believed Equius' typing quirk to be a not-so-subtle reference to phalluses, when it was actually a bow and arrow.
- The MSPA Reader accidentally kills Terezi by hanging her; this is a reference to how Neophyte Redglare was lynched by the mind-controlled lowblood spectators during Mindfang's trial.
- Terezi mentioned that Karkat has more or less forgotten about Sgrub and now keeps talking about Dave, which confuses her.
- When Terezi asks what a mom is, the MSPA Reader says that " ".