Snowman is a member of the Felt, a rival gang of the Midnight Crew. She was originally the Black Queen from the trolls' game session, but was exiled to Alternia and took the title of Banished QuasiroyalHS.svg.

She is the only female (as well carapace) member of the Felt, and is one of the three members whose name is not printed entirely in green. The "o" is printed in black (which makes the "o" look like an 8 Ball itself). Her weapon is her cigarette holder, the innocuous double of a black-and-white lance.

She's named after the slang term for pocket 8's in the game poker, due to the similarity in shape between a snowman and the number '8'. Furthermore, her name seems ironic as her black carapace is unique among the Felt and a Snowman is usually white.

Biography[edit | edit source]

As the Black Queen[edit | edit source]

Removing the Ring of Orbs Twelvefold.png

Like all other session’s Black Queen, she was the ruler of the Derse kingdom. She, however, refused to wear her Ring of Orbs Twelvefold because it would give her the attributes of the Genesis Frog, which is considered a vile creature in Dersite society. Aradia had prototyped the head of the frog temple, saying it was critical for successHS.svg.

Assuming that nobody would be aware of the parting from her source of power, she had no concerns about the decision. She was however proven wrong, as the Courtyard Droll had been observing her and promptly informed Jack Noir about her current weakness. Jack, motivated by his hatred for the Queen, which seems to be another constant of the game, passed this information on to Karkat Vantas and formed an alliance with him. This enabled the Red Team to easily dethrone and exile her.

Some time prior to her exiling she acquired the Flarp manuals of Terezi, Vriska, Aradia, and Tavros, as well as the ~ATH manual of Karkat through her agents. She combined the codes in the manuals with Vriska's magic cue ball and Lil Cal to create Doc Scratch through ectobiology.

As an Exile[edit | edit source]

At the former location of Kanaya's hive, Snowman discovered her command station at an unknown point in time after joining the Felt. She is Vriska's exile, but switched to primarily working with Terezi after Vriska proved to be too stubbornHS.svg.  Presumably, she can control the other Trolls, but was uninterested in anyone but Terezi and Vriska (The former Team Scourge). She advised them with the intent of attacking Derse in order to have Jack Noir exiled as revenge, and probably also part of the plans of Doc Scratch and/or Lord English. Semi-ironically, one of the things she has ordered Terezi to do as part of this particular Weird Plot and Time Shit was to preemptively steal, and then destroy her Ring of Orbs before it could be stolen by Jack Noir.

As a member of the Felt[edit | edit source]

While wandering the ruins of Alternia, the Quasiroyal was approached by Doc Scratch, who presumably recruited her into the Felt, giving her the powers and identity of Snowman.

In the Midnight Crew intermission, Snowman appears while Spades is exploring an alternate timeline. For Spades, killing her is "out of the question," as her death will result in the destruction of the universe. Being fully aware of this, she abuses it and stabs Spades in the eye with her cigarette holder. Awesome deeds done, she promptly disappears again.

After Spades pries open the vault, Snowman suddenly appears again, shoots his key, and rips off one of his arms in an attempt to prevent him from using his barcode tattoo to enter the spade door in the vault. She then locks Spades inside and disappears from view.

Having seen Slick's death (using a similar method to the Seer of Mind), she appears in Scratch's house to prevent said death by killing Quarters. They then proceed to have a passionate hate snog until Scratch proceeds to auspisticize between the two.

Scratch shoos Snowman away and gives Spades Slick a good what-for that - Slick is to kill Snowman, not kiss her. Slick and Snowman finally have a showdown during the events of the Critical Moment: Slick, armed with Scratch's pistol, kills her, and destroys the trolls' universe in turn. She welcomes his attack, knowing that this has been the purpose she signed up for when joining the Felt, and taking pleasure in the fact that her demise will result in the death of a Genesis Frog, the creature all Dersites loathe. This series of events was one of two requirements for The Tumor's detonation as orchestrated by Doc Scratch, concurrent with the Red Miles ravaging the human's universe. At the same time, her death and the consequent destruction of the Alternian universe contributed to the arrival of Lord English.

Abilities[edit | edit source]

Snowman's lifespan is directly tied to that of the Alternian Genesis Frog. This has made her, quite literally, the Alternian universe. She can still be killedHS.svg, but doing so would mean the end for the trolls' universe, giving her an ultimate deterrent. According to Andrew's Tumblr post, this ability was bestowed upon her by Doc Scratch when she joined the Felt. The specifics of the process are unknown, but it made her blood blue, the color representing the Alternian universe. Incidentally, it is also the color of the liquid contained inside magic 8 balls.

This may be related to her number, as the 8-ball must be pocketed last in Eight Ball Pool. If it is pocketed earlier, the player who pocketed it loses.

Beyond these powers she is also an adept fighter capable of using both firearms and her lance. Her secondary weapon is her whip, the "Black Inches", which is said to have caused more than a few "Red Cheeks".

When it comes to the finer aspects of life she likes to play haunting tunes on her electronic violin (preferably in her fancy Three in the morning dress).

Snowman also could teleport around Alternia and its moons by disappearing and reappearing elsewhere. It is unknown whether she could see her linked universe's timelines or knew about Spades Slick's supposed death from another method.

Gallery[edit | edit source]

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • Snowman's charge, Vriska Serket, uses dice - the same weapon Hearts Boxcars uses in Problem Sleuth. Inversely, Tavros Nitram, Hearts Boxcars' charge, uses a lance.
    • Vriska has a habit of breaking magic 8 balls - aside from the items having a clear connection to Snowman, breaking them may have foreshadowed her death.
  • Snowman can be seen on the "Seven of Swords" card with Spades Slick, on the "Two of Swords" card with Spades Slick and Doc Scratch, and on the "Queen of Swords" by herself in the Homestuck Tarot card deck.
  • The commands refer to Snowman as the 8th exileHS.svg. While this is in clear reference to her position on the Felt, it also seems to imply the A2 session had at least three other exiles besides herself and the Midnight Crew.
    • Vriska also happened to be the 8th troll to enter The Medium.


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